Stephanie Samuel is attending the Defined by God Conference in San Diego. Here are the highlights:
9:30 A.M. - Lisa Chan
Lisa Chan, wife of Crazy Love author Francis Chan, is the first speaker of the Friday session.
Chan says she struggles as a paster's wife with the passage in Luke that calls on Christians to deny themselves. "That was really heavy."
"We have to check our selves, we the church, for protection but we don't want to submit ourselves."
Chan asks the crowd if they are really submitted to God In their ministry. Lisa Chan said, "What makes ministry authentic is when we give ourselves."
Chan said Jesus laid his life down for us so now you die, you lay your life down. She said she does not want her message to sound sad ... God wants us to have the fullness of joy but first comes death.
Chan said that God longs to use us in so may ways if we would submit to God's will. She said God used her to give a sweatshirt she bought for her birthday for a young lady she was mentoring.
Chan talks about her travels to Asia with her husband. "God help us, we don't know what its like to struggle."
Chan urges to channel the focus and self discipline like that of olympic athletics. "We should be the most dedicated and self disciplined people as followers of Christ."
Chan on faith, daily walk with God: "We are honest. We're just lazy. We don't want to work on our relationship with Christ."
Chan tears up as she talks about her family's decision to leave their Simi Valley church. Before the trip, she cultivated her self control by denying little things... a diet coke here, purchase there. Later God used that reservoir of faith to prepare for the move to Asia. "I feel that God used all those little things, those little training sessions."
10:13 A.M. Logos Bible Software, the parent company of the Faithlife Women, is introducing some tools for the pastors' wives.
10:24 A.M. DBG host announces the winner of the free lunch with Lisa Chan and the other guest speakers.
10:25 A.M Conference breaks for 15 mins.
10:45 Conference resumes with worship music.
10:55 Conference attendees break into small groups for fellowship and prayer.
11:30 Conference breaks for lunch.
1:20 Conference resumes with praise and worship.
1:25 Worship band sings the Brian Johnson song One Thing Remains with these words "Your love never fails and never gives on me, and runs out on me."
2:06 Jani Ortlund, executive vice president of Renewal Ministries, said when setting boundaries pastors wives must set limits around their our day(s) off and "free PKs to live normal lives" and embrace Jesus as their savior, not their parents' savior.
2:09 Jani Ortlund says "God calls families. He doesn't just call the daddy. He calls the mommy and the children too."
2:12 Lauren Chandler said she homeschools children. She also tries to involve her oldest daughter in mission trips so that she can "see how Jesus works."
2:15 Jani Ortlund asked the pastors' wives to "pray for someone to care for you."
2:16 Lauren Chandler said that her husband Matt had someone to care for him during his ordeal with brain tumors.
2:27 In speaking of ministry friends, Naomi Chong told pastors' wives to invest in their husband the same way they invest in their best girlfriends.
2:31 In answering the question how to support your husband, Jani Ortlund says she ministers to her husband with "food and rest": She cooks him a good meal and avoids pressuring him with more concerns and worries.
2:33 Naomi Chong said her husband just wants to know from her that she loves him.
2:35 Lisa Chan said, "Sometimes there is nothing you can do to heal his spirit." She continues, "The best tool that I have is to get on my knees and go to battle in prayer."
2:40 Conference break
3:00 Ortlund takes the stage to discuss "Refining Your Romance."
3:21 Jani Ortlund: Rescue your romance by recognize your husband's worth.
3:23 Jani Ortlund on depression in the ministry: told pastors' wives to learn about depression because it is "the common cold of emotions." She told them not to use bad theology to shame each other about depression. "Depression is not a sin."
3:25 She quotes a seminarian who said, "Let your ministry be strategic dying." Determine which things you can let go so that you can have joy and peace.
3:27 Going back to romancing your husband, extend grace to your husband, let him know you appreciate him.
3:29 Ortlund told wives: men tend to take advice as a lack of approval. Let others advise your husband. Wives show that you accept them as they are.
3:32 Jani Ortlund: Tell wives while you should not try to fix your husband in ministry, coach your husband in how to better loving your husband.
3:39 Ortlund says having children with your husband "is like running a daycare with someone you used to date."
3:42 on Physical Romance: "The Bible is pro-romance."
3:43 A strong happy marriage is a strong defense against the force that comes against you.
3:43 Orlund strongly believes that a pastor's wife's top responsibility is to satisfy the pastor.
She recommends wives buy the book Intended for Pleasure by Ed and Gaye Wheat and says to kick start things by planning a surprise that only he can enjoy.
3:52 Ortlund reminds women to never accept that the lie that we have grown past the love of God. Remember marriage is not the greatest experience in life, God's love is. Now she says show God is in your marriage. "Ask yourself is your husband married to Mrs. Law or Mrs. Grace?"
3:58 "Open your heart up to God and bring that God home to your husband."
4:00 Ortlund closed her discussion in prayer.
4:08 Worship band sings "Our God Reigns."
Photos From Conference:
For Further Reading: