Guest Views

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Posted 5/27/15 at 3:10 PM | Christian Post Guest Voices

When Your Husband Walks Away from the Faith

What do you do when you feel like you’re in an unequally yoked marriage?

It’s Wednesday, the day when we always talk marriage! I introduce a post, and then give you all a chance to link up your marriage posts below. And today we’re going to talk about husbands walking away from the faith.

Here’s a note I recently a received from a woman whose husband is no longer a spiritual leader:

My husband and I met while in our church’s college group. We were both actively involved as leaders. I was drawn to him as a spiritual leader. We dated for two years, but after we got married he revealed that he had bitterness towards the church and felt he had been hurt deeply by people there. He is still a loving, gentle, and devoted husband, but I struggle deeply with this change in his heart. He recently stated he wasn’t sure why it was important to read the bible independently. I am unsure if he spends time reflecting and or praying for our family. He has agreed to be involved in a home group, but I struggle with feeling bitter and angry at him for his lack of spiritual leadership. I long to love and serve alongside him, and am not sure how I as his wife can can support him as he works through this other than praying for him. FULL POST

Posted 5/27/15 at 3:06 PM | Christian Post Guest Voices

10 Reasons to Rejoice

The coach walks up and down the sideline in front of his players.

“Get your heads up! All of you! Take those stupid towels off your head! Let’s show some courage around here! The game is not over yet. You’re not defeated until you quit fighting. Lift up your heads! Look like champions!”

The disciples had returned from a trial run in which they had practiced preaching the gospel of Jesus. Since the time would come when Jesus would be absent and they would be doing this “for real,” the Lord wanted them to get a taste of what to expect.

They returned sky high. “Lord! It was wonderful! We saw miracles. Lives changed. People healed. It was great!”

Jesus agreed. “You’re right. In fact, I saw Satan fall like lightning from heaven.”

“However,” He said, “I do not want you rejoicing because of such.”

“Do not rejoice because the spirits are subject to you. Rejoice because your names are written in heaven” (Luke 10:20). FULL POST

Posted 5/26/15 at 10:32 AM | Christian Post Guest Voices

Love Yourself the Way You Are

I was just on my Twitter timeline and saw a fake behind. It hurt my heart. This world has made so many women feel unworthy. So many women feel less than or unacceptable. Women have a certain standard to live up to that men don't have. You don't see men going to get anything artificial on their body.

There are many famous men who have chosen to keep their gap, chipped, or crooked teeth. Men aren't getting fake biceps or pectorals. Why don't men have to live up to this imaginary standard? Because we set the standards by what we reinforce. Whatever men praise is who women want to become. Grown boys tend to outwardly praise Grown girls, while grown men keep their feelings to themselves. As a result, the strong, confident women don't get enough praise so society begins to believe that men want the insecure, attention seeking women on the Internet.
No one ever said go get butt implants. Every man I've ever asked has said he doesn't want his woman to get them. At my seminars I call all the men up and 90% of them say if they had a choice they wouldn't even want their woman to wear artificial eye-lashes or hair. We just accept it because it's the norm. We deal with it but we don't prefer it.
It's a personal choice and you can do whatever you want with your body. But at least ask yourself, why? Who are you altering your body for? Who are you risking your life for? Are they worth it?
I know plenty of women who have had everything about them changed and still are hated on by the same females as before. They are still being cheated on and taken advantage of by men. Nothing has changed except body parts and outer adornments.
It's not your body that needs fixing. It's your mind. You have to change the way you see yourself. You have to embrace and enhance your natural beauty. You have to love the skin you're in and trust that at the right time, the right person will find you and love you for who you are.
If you've already made changes for mankind, ok, it's fine. Most of us do at some point. But stop there. Don't keep changing yourself trying to win the affection of others. Don't keep risking your sanity trying to please onlookers. Nothing will change the way people see you until you change the way you see yourself.
Love who you are. Embrace who you are. Stay unique by being you. When you change everything about you trying to win the affection of mankind you become a copy instead of an original.
Tony A. Gaskins Jr.
Join me on the Real Love Tour: http://www.tonygaskins.com/events 
Real Love University is enrolling now: http://www.tonygaskins.com/reallove 
Become a Certified Life Coach: http://tonygaskins.com/coachtraining/ 

Posted 5/26/15 at 10:22 AM | Christian Post Guest Voices

Why Christians are Losing the Culture War

Christians are in a Culture War. And I don’t think we’re doing a particularly good job.

Yesterday was my birthday, and I posted about theDuggar abuse scandal. Which got read a lot. And which kind of consumed the day (I didn’t even get cake).

So perhaps I’m just feeling a little contemplative today, but I have a bunch of thoughts in my brain that I thought I should try to get down. I hope they make sense, but after a weekend of watching many Christians defend the Duggars’ decision not to immediately remove Josh from the home; saying “the girls are absolutely fine! You can tell because we see that on TV!”; and “it was only touching; it wouldn’t have done that much harm”, I guess I’m just a little restless and rather sad.

So I want to give my hypothesis of what’s happening in our culture. FULL POST

Posted 5/26/15 at 9:48 AM | Christian Post Guest Voices

Things Scripture Does Not Allow

“God, who at various times and in various ways spoke in time past to the fathers by the prophets, has in these last days spoken to us by His Son, whom He has appointed heir of all things, through whom also He made the worlds, who being the brightness of His glory and the express image of His person, and upholding all things by the word of His power, when He had by Himself purged our sins, sat down at the right hand of the Majesty on high, having become so much better than the angels, as He has by inheritance obtained a more excellent name than they” (Hebrews 1:1-4).

Whew. What a sentence.

The Lord Jesus Christ was God’s last word to Planet Earth. Everything He had to say. Man’s last and greatest hope.

Man’s only hope.

Jesus spoke of a landowner who leased out a property to some renters who refused to be accountable. When his servants arrived to collect his rents, the unscrupulous tenants “beat one, killed one, and stoned another.” Showing more patience than perhaps he ought, the owner “sent other servants, more than the first.” These were given the same treatment as the first. Then our Lord said, “Last of all, he sent his son.” (Matthew 21:33ff.). FULL POST

Posted 5/25/15 at 11:37 AM | Christian Post Guest Voices

Why All Churches Should Address Depression & Anxiety

It’s no secret that my past was ridden with mental health issues—ones that kept me from wanting to live for much of my teenage life. I’m very vocal about this truth, and I will continue to be as along as my story may have an impact on others who need to hear it. And while I do believe today’s church is doing better at addressing the issue that is mental health, I believe there can be so much more done than what is currently taking place in regards to depression and anxiety. Let me explain.

I never tried to take my own life in my younger years, but I frequently found myself googling painless ways to commit suicide, and really had no remorse once finding what I was looking for. It was a sad state to be in. The reality is that my life was infected with the burden of depression and anxiety, and the only places I could find reliable information from were not churches in my local area. Why? Because mental illness wasn’t really talked about. FULL POST

Posted 5/25/15 at 11:27 AM | Christian Post Guest Voices

Why I Never Debate an Unbeliever

The main reason I shy away from debating anyone about the Christian faith is that if I did a poor job–and knowing my limitations, I can almost guarantee that would be the case–I’d hate for spectators to believe Jesus was no more than my poor representation of Him.

The Truth is far greater than my understanding of it or my ability to articulate it.

It’s possible to lose a debate and still be right.

As a young pastor, I was sandbagged into a debate. A young man in his late teens told me how he had been dallying with the Jehovah Witnesses and that his parents were concerned. He wondered if he and his father could meet me in my office one evening to talk. I agreed.

They showed up that night, accompanied by two Jehovah Witnesses, men loaded for bear. They were itching for a fight and mistakenly thought I was ready to take them on.

Looking back, what I should have done was inform the father and son that I had not agreed to this situation and wish them a good night, and gone home. As it was, I meekly brought the four of them into our church conference room where we sat around a table and I became the sacrificial lamb. FULL POST

Posted 5/20/15 at 3:05 PM | Christian Post Guest Voices

7 Characteristics of Strong Women of God

Girls, we have been bombarded with messages about what we are to believe about ourselves and the world around us. I don’t know about you, but I have questions. Let’s talk about the word “FEMINIST”…… am I one? I don’t know. I mean, I hear celebrities spouting off about being a feminist and how women should be equal with men, and I get so many mixed messages. Women that label themselves feminists say they want equality- they want to be treated just like men, but I don’t want that! I am a woman, thank God. I am special and set apart unique and different, far, far different from a man.

With that being said, the bottom line is, I don’t care what they say. I don’t care to be a feminist. I want to be a Proverbs 31 woman. I want to be a godly woman. I want to be a strong woman. I want to be the woman that God created me to be. How am I to do that? Here are 7 things I think strong, godly women have in common and what I strive for in my life. FULL POST

Posted 5/20/15 at 1:05 PM | Christian Post Guest Voices

The High Cost of Disobedience

“Then Jesus said to His disciples, ‘If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it; but whoever loses his life for me will find it. For what does it profit a man to gain the whole world and lose his own soul? Or, what will a man give in exchange for his soul?” (Matthew 16:24-26)

What do you have to give up to serve the Lord? Well, for starters, you give up your sin and guilt, your anguish and your lostness. You give up your waywardness and fears, your selfishness and your pride. You give up being lord of your own life and master of all your own choices.

Paul called this “presenting your bodies as a living sacrifice” (Romans 12:1).

It’s a daily exercise, by the way. While we wish we could do a one-time-works-forever thing, it’s not to be. “I die daily,” said the apostle (I Corinthians 15:31). And so do we, if we get this right. FULL POST

Posted 5/19/15 at 11:38 AM | Christian Post Guest Voices

Writing Well

We learned last week that William Zinnser has died. He was known primarily as the author of On Writing Well, a classic guide to composing non-fiction. It is a book that has meant a lot to me as I have attempted to mature as a writer. This weekend I breezed back through all my notes and highlights and found that the ideas that most impacted me can be distilled into 5 simple headings. I also found that the ideas are applicable not only to professional writers like Zinnser, but to anyone who wants to grow in communication skills. Here are 5 things Zinnser taught me:

BE DILIGENT

There is really no such thing as that fabled “natural writer.” What actually distinguishes the good authors from the great ones is simply their diligence. Good authors humble themselves with the knowledge of how poor they are, and then they commit themselves to endless practice.

  • “Few people realize how badly they write.”
  • “The only way to learn to write is to force yourself to produce a certain number of words on a regular basis.”
  • “Good writers of prose must be part poet, always listening to what they write.”
  • “A clear sentence is no accident. Very few sentences come out right the first time, or even the third time. Remember this in moments of despair. If you find that writing is hard, it’s because it is hard.”
  • “Clear thinking becomes clear writing; one can’t exist without the other. It’s impossible for a muddy thinker to write good English.”

BE RUTHLESS

While Zinsser believes that writing is an act of ego (see below), he also calls for a kind of humility that manifests itself in ruthless editing. If he is known for anything, it is for his constant calls to cut the clutter that marks too much writing (my own included). FULL POST

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