Cutting America’s Divorce Rate

No-fault divorce has had a devastating effect on our culture. For decades now, one spouse has been able to unilaterally destroy their marriage, family and children. The marriage contract is the only contract in America that doesn't mean anything. In no other contractual agreement, can one person walk away without repercussions. You can't even break a contract with a plumber or a cell phone company without paying a penalty! Not so with marriage - one spouse can just walk away and the other one has no legal grounds to stop it, even if he or she doesn't want the divorce. Sadly, this is the case in far too many divorces.

There are some possible solutions to this troubling problem. People and groups such as Mike McManus and his organization Marriage Savers are advocating changes in laws to eliminate no-fault divorce. Additionally, some states now have what is called covenant marriage. This is an option where when you marry you sign a covenant that requires pre-marital counseling and it also makes a divorce more difficult to obtain. Essentially, you choose to say "no" to the option of no-fault divorce. This way it takes more than just one spouse deciding that he or she isn't happy and walking away to end the marriage. I highly recommend that all states lobby for such an option, because it would give the Church a lot more power to wield against no-fault divorce than we realize!

Think this through: 90% of marriages are performed in a church. Currently in most churches people can get married with nothing required for them. What if the Church began to build a new standard among people of faith? We need to start telling couples you can't be living together, you have to go through pre-marital counseling, you have to sign a covenant and agree to counseling when things get tough. That way when people come to a church and want to get married, we can say: we'll only marry you if you choose covenant marriage. Besides, it's a free country and if you don't want to get married under a covenant, then go to Vegas or the justice of the peace. But, if you want to get married in a church now it means something. We could virtually eliminate no-fault divorce because the church has the upper hand.

But we must have the option of the covenant where you just can't walk out in the marriage if you feel like it. There may be divorce because of adultery or abuse, but honestly, most marriages don't end for those reasons. Most end because one just doesn't want to be married anymore, or they say it's irreconcilable, or one leaves because the other spouse isn't meeting their emotional needs or their pets don't get along. People leave for the dumbest reasons and pay a really high price... and sadly for children, they pay an even higher price.

Most marriages can be saved, but not in the situation where one person walks out and the other one has no say. If Christians were really smart, this is a battle that we would be fighting for when it comes to marriage. We have more power to change the culture and preserve marriages and families than we think.

Mark Gungor is one of the most sought-after speakers on marriage and family in the country. Each year thousands of couples attend his Laugh Your Way to a Better Marriage® seminars. His take on marriage issues is refreshingly free of both churchy and psychological lingo. Mark is pastor of Celebration Church in Green Bay, WI. He speaks for churches, civic events, and business meetings and is even a speaker for the US Army. Mark has been featured on national broadcasts such as Focus on the Family and ABC News. His daily internet radio show is heard on over 250 radio stations nationwide, and his television show Love, Marriage and Stinking Thinking is available nationwide on TBN and Sky Angel. Learn more about Mark and his marriage seminars at www.laughyourway.com.