Marriage & Family

CP Blogs do not necessarily reflect the views of The Christian Post. Opinions expressed are solely those of the author(s).

Posted 11/26/14 at 6:56 PM | Trace Embry

The Important Role of Therapeutic Boarding Schools

Therapeutic boarding schools play an important role in bringing teens out of crisis.

However, do most families really need residential care like that of a therapeutic boarding school?

I had a discussion with a man once who was in his mid-sixties. He helped me repair a part on my motorcycle.

In appreciation, I encouraged him by saying, “It is good to see an American work ethic in America again.”

The gentleman turned to me and said, “America? Son, America is Over.”

His response weighed heavy on me and helped me realign my calling in life by doing my part to restore America to the great nation it once was. Since 1994, I have focused my efforts on specifically restoring America’s families.

The Problem

Since I have been alive, I have seen America’s families dramatically disintegrate. Based on my experience, I can confidently say that there is a direct correlation to the decline in our culture and the decline in our families. FULL POST

Posted 11/26/14 at 10:28 AM | Christian Post Guest Voices

When is it Okay to Give Up on My Marriage?

Today I’m going to do a heartbreaking one: How do I know when to give up on my marriage? When have I done enough and tried hard enough? I get variations on this quite frequently, and I’ll share two with you today:

It took me a long time to figure out why I was so angry at him for so many years. It felt like he was holding back love and affection from me and that he didn’t care about or for me. Even when I tell him I would like to be hugged or touched he could barely do it. I feel rejected from my husband. Being a Christian woman I do not believe in leaving and I really do not want to. I feel like a prisoner in this relationship. I cannot leave for the commitment I made but I am dying inside with lack of affection. What am I to do? How much daily rejection can I keep taking. I touch him nicely on the shoulders or back and he acts like I am not even there. He has all sorts of “good” reasons to not be affectionate to me they all stem to something I said or did years ago. FULL POST

Posted 11/25/14 at 6:18 PM | Bill Blacquiere

When Foster Care Fails a Child

Today’s guest blog is contributed by Kris Faasse, Senior Vice President of Clinical Services at Bethany and recent guest host of our Every Child podcast with Steve Pemberton.

With more than 400,000 children in the United States living in foster care and a national average of more than 23,000 youth aging out of the foster care system every year, the need for families for these kids and especially for teens is great. Our N.O.W. (No One Without) Initiative promotes foster care adoption to help ensure that no child goes without a loving family. But what happens when a child gets stuck in the system and has only a secret he cannot share?

At the age of 3, Steve was separated from his five siblings and their unstable, alcoholic mother. His first foster family literally left him out in the cold. His second, where he stayed for a decade, was worse. Subjected to extraordinary cruelty, Steve grew up without positive support, nurturing, or training for success. But what he did have—along with the comfort of books given to him by a benevolent neighbor and read to escape the harsh reality of his childhood—was a keen attention to sounds, faces, and words. FULL POST

Posted 11/25/14 at 2:19 PM | Karen Farris

Mom's Thanksgiving Cabin

The pleasant aroma of roasting turkey reminded me of past Thanksgivings. But nothing else seemed the same. Mom now lived in a tiny log cabin tucked in the woods. She’d always dreamed of building a place hidden within the trees. And even though it was small, it was warm and welcoming.

Her life hadn’t been easy—many disappointments and setbacks along the way. But she always treasured Thanksgiving—it was when we’d gather, celebrate our blessings, and treasure our brief time together. We sat around her small oak table and while I didn’t know it then, it was the final Thanksgiving we’d share there together. Cancer may have claimed her life, but it couldn’t steal my memories or change my thankful heart.

In a way that only God could have orchestrated, I now celebrate Thanksgiving in the same little log cabin. And each time, I'm reminded that Thanksgiving is found in our hearts. It’s a wonderfully special day to honor God in Whom all blessings flow. Even though life may change where we live, it doesn’t have to change who we are and the family we love.

Posted 11/24/14 at 4:51 PM | Shaunti Feldhahn

Marriage Monday with Shaunti Feldhahn: Banish the D-Word

Christian Post Blog Marriage Monday Tip Of The Day from Shaunti Feldhahn

November 24, 2014

Welcome to Marriage Mondays! Each Monday, join me as I share my top findings on the little, eye-opening things that make a big difference in creating great marriages and relationships. Today’s post is one of a series on the surprising truths that men and women tend not to know about each other–and which change everything once we do.

Tip #39: Banish the D-word

Photo Credit: seanmcgrath via Compfight cc

Are there some words that you try to keep out of your vocabulary? In our family, from the time our kids were little they knew we just didn’t say certain words in our family. Not just the usual four-letter swear words, but any word that could become a weapon used against someone else. Any word that was likely to cause hurt to someone we love, and for which any apology might be inadequate. Because once out there, certain words can’t easily be taken back. FULL POST

Posted 11/24/14 at 10:33 AM | Christian Post Guest Voices

How Technology Threatens Marriages

It’s 1975 and Mr. Company Manager needs to talk to Ms. Sales Manager about an account. It’s after hours, so he picks up the phone and calls her at home. Her husband answers. The two chat for a bit about the latest Maple Leafs’ loss, and then husband passes the phone to wife.

It’s 1991 and Miss Recent Law Grad needs to talk to Mr. Lawyer Partner about a case on the weekend. She dials his home phone and Mr. Lawyer’s 4-year-old son answers. Recent Law Grad convinces him to pass the phone to his mommy, who explains that Mr. Lawyer Partner is out taking the 8-year-old to gymnastics. Miss Recent Law Grad used to take gymnastics, too. They chat for a bit about the lessons, and she leaves a message with Mrs. Lawyer Partner explaining why she’s bugging Mr. Lawyer Partner at home.

It’s 1982 and Johnny Doe is driving through his hometown when he passes the old “make out bridge”. He has fleeting thoughts of Mary Jane, with whom he often frequented that spot. But he doesn’t look her up, because he has no idea where she is. She’s probably married anyhow. FULL POST

Posted 11/24/14 at 10:29 AM | Christian Post Guest Voices

The Myth of Sexual Incompatibility

The evangelical church has found sex.

After years of being rightfully accused of prudery, many Christians have done a 180, deciding that the best form of evangelism is showing the world just how much we get it on. In July 2013, Pastor Joe Nelms of Family Baptist Church in Lebanon, Tennessee started a firestorm when, in his opening prayer at a NASCAR race, he thanked God for his “smokin’ hot wife”. Disgraced megachurch pastor Mark Driscoll was renowned for riddling his sermons with sexual innuendos. Closer to home, Christians are hosting “Passion Parties“, just like Tupperware parties, except without as much plastic, where women can shop for lingerie, sex toys, and lubricants in their own homes, with friends.

The message: sex in marriage is awesome!

But is it? This sexual evangelism caused Rachel Pietka to pen an opinion post for Relevant Magazine saying that “Christians Aren’t Called to Have Amazing Sex.” After all, if we aren’t supposed to have sex until we’re married, there’s no way to find out if you’re sexually incompatible. Obviously, then, God never meant for amazing sex to be a staple of a good Christian marriage. FULL POST

Posted 11/21/14 at 8:06 AM | Karen Farris

Start with American Hunger

We’d gathered in the high school library and even though it was against library policy, the hosts were providing cider and cookies. Folding chairs were arranged facing a microphone at the front. Soon the award ceremony would begin.

I took a seat and a friend from another non-profit spotted me and quickly came beside me. We used to work together at the crisis pregnancy center, but a rural K-12 school needed my help as a volunteer grant writer.

Stacks of white envelopes were on a table in front and as God’s providence would have it, the award for my organization was announced first. I rose and went to shake hands with the chairman of the board, who was bestowing thousands of dollars to all the non-profit organizations in the large room. I shared briefly about the impact that this money would have on our small school.

Sitting down, I then listened to the words of acceptance for fifty other small non-profits in our community. But there was one issue that we all were dealing with—and it wasn’t just poverty, abuse, or homelessness. It was hunger. Of the $250,000 given away that day—money that needed to be stretched over lean budgets for all of the coming year, much of it would be spent on food for the hungry. FULL POST

Posted 11/20/14 at 7:18 PM | Carolyn Henderson

Trust Me: You're Smart Enough to Read the Bible

Phonograph Days inspirational original oil painting of 1940s nostalgia woman in Victorian home by Steve Henderson
Steve Henderson Fine Art
We're smarter cookies than we give ourselves credit for, and we can understand art, music, literature, and other intellectual pursuits -- like reading the Bible -- more than we think we can. Phonograph Days, original oil painting by Steve Henderson.

Flattery is a remarkable weapon.

Though I'm not a Bible Study Group girl, someone almost caught me years ago by commenting,

"You're smart."

Got my attention, that did.

"I think you'd do great in our Bible Study for Intelligent People class,"(and no, it wasn't called that), "because we're looking for students who are willing to read and do research during the week."

"You mean there's homework?"

"Oh yes, only we don't call it that. But there's a good 7 or 8 pages each week to write up answers to questions. Sometimes it's multiple choice, there are essay questions -- 3 or 4 hours a week, minimum. It teaches people to be accountable." FULL POST

Posted 11/20/14 at 11:02 AM | Brittney Moses

25 Family Christmas Traditions to Make This Season Special

And so the world begins to prepare for the Holidays the moment Halloween ends! I went into Walmart the other day and the aisles we already lined with gifts and decorations. A chill of excitement stirred me as It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas rang in my head. I don’t know about you but I love the spirit of this time of year. I personally had a lot of great childhood memories when Christmas came around and my parents did everything they could to make sure it was special for us. For others, you may not have had the same experience. But we have an opportunity to restore the joy, love and peace of the season to our families with just enough effort.

I want Austin to grow up with warm memories of the Christmas season and most of all I want him to know that Jesus is the reason for the season. So we’re going to start up our own set of Family Christmas Traditions to make this season bright! FULL POST

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